Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Randomize
