I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I need to calm my uterus...
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
