Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
