we should wear snuggies to the strip club
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize
