She said her name was "party"
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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