the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Randomize
