I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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