Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
