i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Randomize
