are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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