I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Randomize
