just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
