That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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