New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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