it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
