Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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