Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
