I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
