had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Are my feet made of real feet?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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