508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
These tits shall not be calmed
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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