butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
