the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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