Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
