I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
