I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
These tits shall not be calmed
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
