Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
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