i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
