you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
