tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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