i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
