Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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