it's too hot outside to masturbate.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
