is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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