My Higher Power is John Stamos
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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