Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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