i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
