would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
