And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
