Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
