I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
