forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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