You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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