I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
