I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm like, not good at living.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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