He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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