turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
