i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
