i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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