What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
