this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
