so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Four minutes until I can fart!
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Randomize
