she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
