K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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